2013年10月16日 星期三

2.1 Premarital cohabitation: annotation 1

"The Reasons to Support Cohabitation:
 1. To test if he or she would be a ideal mate.
 2. Only care about what we had once.
 3. To learn how to face the real life.
 4. To have a identity that between single and unmarried.
 5. To make the time that fighting together earlier.
 6. To make the relationship stable."
- from "Living Together for Love",Yi-Xin Huang,published by Gao-Lin International AG.
  Cohabitation, which means couples come up a thought to live together. It becomes more and more popular recently, in the meanwhile, this phenomenon starts to assault the established concept in our society. I also have friends who are thinking about the possibility of cohabitation, however, they all refused eventually which made me to think about their reasons. I'm stand on the positive side even that I'm single, so why are these girls who is in a relationship rejected this cohabitation choice?
  We can start from why we should support people to take cohabitation. First, this is a right of liberty that the law allowed. No one could judge or forbid it. Second,couples can see things, understand things, and learn things during the cohabitation. Third, the book I quoted mentioned that cohabitation is to transfer the abstract feelings to reality. This book also said the benefits of the cohabitation, in page 56, it said," The telephone charge that saved could buy two more clothes." And in page 57, it said," The time you two stick together is much longer than separating." These reasons are so practical to approve why the cohabitation should be accepted rather than being discriminated.
  Talking about discrimination, cohabitation used to be considered negative, and our first thought while seeing it would be " Those girls who does this must be terrible." How we see this term at this way? Why our first idea comes to blame on girls? It can trace back to our traditional background. In ancient time, people emphasized the virginity of girls because of the domination of masculinity. However, we are living in a world which values the equity, how could we still see things at this old, ancient way? How could we call ourselves modern people when our ideology didn't improve? This kind of thought could be called prejudice nowadays. And there is one more interesting thing that "Live Together for Love" mentioned, maybe the boys are at the disadvantage. It is surprising that they could suffer from their masculism that they always want to pay for all the life stuff or the things to cater to their girlfriends. So we'll never know who's the winner, then we can't give judgement to the couples who take cohabitation.
  There is no right-or-false question in the definition of cohabitation. Cohabitation is only a kind of way for lovers to understand his or her lover deeply.That is exactly why I support couples to do the cohabitation at their will because understanding is the most important part of a relationship.

16 則留言:

  1. Just like you said, due to the masculinity, they pay for all the life stuff. If they cohabit, it is possible to create the quarrels of money. Moreover, if the gender are truly equal, why should boys have to afford money. And you said our discrimination on girls influences their right of liberty. But I think girls and boys have differences in body structure naturally. So the worry that girls living with lover is normal and essential. Also, I think if a man really loves a woman, he should protect her reputation instead of letting her be blamed.

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  2. I like the part you said that cohabitation is financially "practical", well living together will certainly save a lot of money by sharing the couple's expenditure. I think in a practical way you prove cohabitation is a better choice. Maybe next time you can argue about the issue on the spiritual aspect of cohabitation, strengthening your point.

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  3. You made your point very clear by listing them out, and they are very strong points, even if your're not in a relationship for now. And I like your point about how "people emphasized the virginity of girls because of the domination of masculinity." It's true that if we change the way we think fundamentally, maybe we won't stand against cohabitation before engagement anymore.

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  4. I agree a lot of your points, and i also understand your idea that ideas of cohabitation is kind of discrimination toward female. Since the public, first heard of cohabitation, would probably generate the idea that the girl do something bad, instead of thinking about the boys. however, this is still the trend that we are not able to change it. If we agree and even encourage our female friends or even our family members to cohabitat with their mate, would it cause damage to their reputation and even influence to their future?

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    1. I don't really understand your question.
      What I discuss is that considering cohabitation a bad idea is a failure of the whole society not the girls' problem. So we should try to change the concept even though this concept seems to be right now.

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  5. It is clear and organized that you presented your annotation. And it is very impressive that you seldom saw your notes and added humor to your presentation. I like your point about we should change the concept from our traditional background since there are still so many conservative people around us.

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  6. I think your presentation is great. It makes me uderstand your point clearly.Also, I love your body languages, they show that you are confident on stage.

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  7. Your presentation points out many things I have never thought about, such as cohabitation can be budget saving and cohabitation can get lovers closer. Besides, I am quite agree with your thesis that lover should live under cohabitation only after serious consideration. However, my doubt toward cohabitation such as the sex problem still not be persuaded. So I'm expecting for your next persuasive presentation.

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  8. The point that we can see the real appearance and habit of our lovers if we have cohabitation. It's true that we behave differently in our home or dormitory so it's a good opportunity to have a glance to his or her intimate habit. If their acceptable, it's true love.

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  9. I feel same like you.
    I support cohabitation because it's a good thing to consider about before entering marriage. Lovers will scan their personal life and figure out if they are right for each other.

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  10. Your new point about the press of patriarchy and liberty of woman is impressive. The reason why you agree cohabitation before marriage is clear and organized. And I found an interesting part which you and your partner have a contradictory idea about a more stable relation. What makes you think the relationship between the cohabitant couples will be more stable?

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    1. Joselin thinks that freshness and enthusiasm is the most important part in a relationship while I think that understand each other or adapt lovers' habits is the foundation of relationship. So I support any ways to know each other better such as cohabitation.

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  11. I agree with you that cohabitation is a way to make sure whether he/shoe is the right one. You focus on cohabitation is discriminated, but I think you should convince people that why those reason of against cohabitation is unnecessary.

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  12. I think your point that people shouldn't judge or discriminate cohabitation is right. I hope you can provide more information about practical and mental part in cohabitation.

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  13. I like your representation. It's lively. And your gesture can let us focus on your representation. So that I can understand your standpoint.

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  14. I stand on your side that cohabitation is okay for couples. You stated your points clearly. And that the telephone charge can be saved is very practical. The longer time you spend with your lover, the closer your relationship will become. I think cohabitation make couple understand each other more deeply in a short time. And during cohabitation, they can decide whether their lover is the right person or not.

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